Social Services in Germany have taken custody of a 7 month old baby whose parents tried to sell on eBay. The opening bid; 1 Euro, or $1.57 for my non-conversionists. Wow, sounds like quite the deal. Surprisingly the parents did not receive a single bid in the 2 and half hours that the baby was up for auction. I think people were just waiting until time was almost up to get that last bid in. The best part about this story (besides the obvious) is the ad itself: “offering my nearly new baby for sale as it has gotten too loud. It is a male baby, nearly 28 inches long and can be used either in a baby carrier or a stroller.”
Not surprisingly, this came from the Bavarian region of Germany who continues to amaze me. My favorite part of this is that the ad tells you that the baby could be used in a stroller or a baby carrier, it is such a versatile product. God bless the internet, just think back in the day if you didn’t want your baby you had to throw it in a dumpster, now you can get paid for it in a competitive shopping environment. I can’t believe no one bid on it. Stupid people, wouldn’t know a good deal if it hit them in the face, or spit up on their shoulder.
The Uppity Bastard has reached a milestone of sorts and we wanted to thank everyone who has supported us, read our ideas, and helped motivate us to keep posting funny/angry/insightful/random pearls of wisdom. We just reached 3000 hits and by my calculation that makes us eligible for the hall of fame. If you get 3000 hits in baseball you are practically guaranteed to get in (unless you are a gambler…I’m looking at you Pete Rose). We hit this stage of internet pseudo-relevance (at least to our friends) in just a little over 2 months, it took Hank Aaron 16 years to get 3000 hits. So suck on that Hank! I know, hitting major league pitching is way different than internet hits but whatever, you say tomato, I say fuck you.
But in all seriousness, thanks to everyone who checks us out. We will keep doing what we are doing, and hopefully some day get paid for it. Keep on keepin on.
-TurtleDog and the rest of The Uppity Bastard Crew
following yesterday’s post about the baby who loved Kanye West, here is another child who shares my passion for smooth and soulful 80’s R&B: