The Uppity Bastard

Smug Life

Pick a Worse Name,

I Dare You.

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May 31, 2008 Posted by | news, random shite, Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

I just found…

…my new favorite website. Sarah Jessica Parker Looks Like a Horse.com

 

 

it works on so many levels.

May 31, 2008 Posted by | movies, random shite, tv | , , , , | 1 Comment

this has nothing to do with anything but…

Lance at Film Drunk posted this Saved by the Bell video today and seeing as how it is TurtleDog’s favorite show, I felt the need to share it.

 

May 30, 2008 Posted by | random shite, tv | , | Leave a comment

Now Go Do That Voodoo that You do So Well

Harvey Korman, aka Hedley Lamar from the Greatest Movie of all Time, Blazing Saddles, died yesterday.  To pay my respect I’m posting some clips of him from the aforementioned flick, which to this day still makes me lose my shit whenever I watch it.

 

May 30, 2008 Posted by | movies, news, random shite | , , | Leave a comment

Good News

The Scripps National Spelling Bee is going on today (and probably some other days too but let’s be honest am I really going to investigate the spelling be?).  This morning round 5 began as I was drinking my coffee, I watched for a minute, I heard some nice little Korean girl spell chrysoprase, (she got it wrong, dumbass) then I realized that I wasn’t insanely stoned and I turned it off.  But if you have copious amounts of intoxicants and you want to hear a bunch of 10 year olds spell words you have never heard of, and never will hear, then I totally encourage you to check it out.  Plus you might see something awesomely hilarious like this…

UPDATE: an Indian girl spelled amylolysis correctly, I was kind of impressed, then I realized she will most likely never get laid.

May 30, 2008 Posted by | news, random shite | , , , , | Leave a comment

you don’t say…

File this headline under “shocking”

At least it is straight to the point.

May 29, 2008 Posted by | news | , , , , | Leave a comment

no no, that doesn’t go there…

I am planning on going to Southeast Asia in August and Cambodia is one of the countries I will visit.  Reading this story made me way more excited to go.

A father, while “playing” with his 5 year old son decided it would be a hoot to play “inflate my kid.”  I don’t know if any of you are familiar with this game but it is the one where the retarded Cambodian father sticks an air hose designed to fill car tires in his 5 year old’s anus.  Unfortunately the game was cut short when Daddy learned that kids don’t inflate.  Don’t worry, the kid (Sok Sambo is his name) suffered a distended stomach but received medical attention and will be just fine for about 15,000 miles before he may need to be re-inflated and possibly rotated.

My favorite part of the story is that the police have decided not to arrest the man because his only offense was “pure stupidity, against which there is currently no law.”  The article was silent on whether the legislature was trying to change that…and how many pounds of pressure a properly inflated 5 year old Cambodian boy’s stomach should achieve.

(what I’m pretty sure Sok Sambo looked like after he and his father were finished playing.)

May 29, 2008 Posted by | news, random shite | , , , , , | 1 Comment

Why to buy a Wii Fit for your girlfriend

ha!

 

May 28, 2008 Posted by | random shite, sports | , , | 1 Comment

Producer Ryan Leslie plays over Weezy’s “Lollipop” live on Sirius radio

I remember this guy coming in to work at my old studio, he’s pretty ridiculous.  Here watch him learn the chord progression and just improvise on piano to the rest of the song.  Pretty rad.

May 27, 2008 Posted by | Music, random shite | , , , , | 1 Comment

this makes my inner nerd happy

Apparently there are hidden levels in Super Mario World that play by themselves, sending you through untouched by the koopas/mushrooms/other bad guys, that trigger sound effects that play out different songs.  This makes me want to break out my old Super Nintendo and find these secret levels.  So Awesome.

 

May 26, 2008 Posted by | great ideas, Music, random shite | , , , | 1 Comment