“Jesus thinks I’m Cool”, the Uppity Bastard knows better.

from the Amazon page:

Product Description

Focus on biblical truths that free people to express their true personalities.

Be strong to stand up to the constant lies from Satan regarding inferiority, lack of self-acceptance and peer pressure.

Become the unique and beautifully designed person God has created to reflect Jesus Christ to the world.

Thirteen weeks of challenging and inspiring readings encourage young people to apply the power of their faith and value in Christ to the issues facing them at school, at work, with friends and family.

 

Wasted Pushups

Over at Street Carnage, one of their guys does a weekly video blog where he takes some sort of drug and then proceeds to do as many pushups as he possibly can.  So far we have seen this mustachioed NY hipster exercise under the influence of alcohol, weed, coke, salvia, crack, heroin (sniffed, not injected), and cough syrup.  

While this is a hilarious idea, most of the episodes have been pretty uneventful.  In my opinion this is the best one yet:

Beer + Coke + Poppers

 

ENJOY.

this guy loves Balls

Serbian author Ljubomir R. Erovic has written a cookbook about delicious ways to cook testicles.

 

I would write more but I’ve been drinking all day and I don’t feel like vomiting all over myself.  Happy Sunday, I hope you all watched Dexter and Mad Men, because they are awesome.

shepshepard’s thai noodle soup recipe

So, now that I have returned from thailand I now have major noodle soup withdrawals. For those of you unfamiliar with noodle soup, its a delicious, spicy, basic, cheap dish available on street corners all over Thailand. Commonly eaten at breakfast, its a great hangover cure. Here’s my own little version.

this guy has way too much time on his hands

Somebody catalogued a bunch of picture-by-picture comparisons of Christian Bale and Kermit the Frog.

fantastic.

Revenge, sweet buttered Revenge

File this under the Greatest Idea EVER

exploding banana helmet

!!!

SFW (safe for work) XXX (naked time)

I posted some pics like this a long time ago.  This video is pretty awesome.

Weezy F. Baby – Sports Blogger

Were you aware that my man Lil Wayne has been given the opportunity to contribute a blog to Espn.com?  Pretty Sweet.  His first entry is out this week, and although it isn’t a particularly interesting read, he does mention that his Fantasy Football team is called the South Beach Sloths (your old pal UB’s favorite animal).

 

I RIDE FOR MY DOGS.

This Chick needs Sperm

This blogger chick is advertising on her site that she is in need of some baby gravy.

“ In less than two weeks, I will be ovulating, which as everyone should know is primetime for baby making.  The problem is that I don’t yet have a partner for this process. Now, I’m not looking for a source of child support or a baby-daddy in the sense that he should have any supportive role in the pregnancy or in raising the child, I just need some good, hearty seed. ”

 

Not a problem Miss, we here at Uppity Bastard are more than willing to help you during your time of need. We even provide you with some variety.  Look at these handsome Bastards:

 

the Uppity Bastard, c.1968

 

TurtleDog, file photo

 

ShepShepard, headshot

 

Expect a package within the next few days.  I’ll be using tupperware to keep everything nice and fresh.